Let's begin again, shall we?

Well hello to you!

Remember me, a blast from the past? Yes, it has been a while since I have graced this blog to spill thoughts out about this thing we call adoption. A long while.

2012 I entered public service as a school board trustee and since that time life has moved at warp speed. I feel as if I have gone back to school in a sense as each and every day I am reading, researching, speaking with the community, chatting it up with students about the intricacies of how school districts are run. It has been quite the education and to be honest, I am loving what I am doing.

With that said, understand that it has also been quite time consuming: governance workshops, conferences, symposiums, more research, trainings, working dinners, 100+ meetings in the first two years and 40+ last year (most school boards meet once a month with occasional special board meetings perhaps 4-6 times a year).

Oh, did I mention that we unified two school districts while serving on separate boards until the merge became official the summer after we were elected? Now that experience could become an interesting writing experience as it is not one of the easiest feats in the universe, nor is there a book on how-to-unify. But that is an entirely different blog, one I may write some years down the line. Perhaps.

With all of this learning under my belt, I have finally had an opportunity to come up for air and find that life I had before I was a public servant. The one where I was a woman with years of experience and positivity to share on this vast topic we call adoption. In my absence, I have seen you looking, reading, liking, and supporting A Birth Mother Voice on various social media sites that exist in our daily lives. I thank you for always reminding me that taking that leap in writing my book and then starting this blog was something that would only enlighten my life and the journey I am continually on, and apparently I am not alone.

So hello to the faithful, welcome to the new ones and if you are just scrolling today and came upon this, check back in a couple of days as I have already been composing some ideas into posts that may interest you. Those who know me often wonder just what may come out of my mouth, and I think that is a good thing. :)

Blog Hop That ROCKS!

When controversy starts, people listen. If you know about the hoopla from this past week when Circle of Moms said they were going to have a contest for most popular adoption blogs only to shut the whole thing down ... well it made quite a few people mad. They were trying to censor voices, but there are those out here in Adoption Online Land that will not stand for it!


Today I was made aware of a Adoption Magazine who has invited ALL VOICES of adoption to join a blog hop. Here is your chance to find new lights, see some truths and endulge in all of the amazing voices out there! Make a cup of jo, get comfy and then dive right in! This list keeps getting better and better!!!!


Adoption Magazine ~ A Real Adoption Blog Hop

Meet Jane

I have been waiting for March for quite sometime. Usually, I hate March. It is the month that holds the anniversary of my mother's death, and that is still a difficult thing for me to come to terms with. Yes, it has been 12 years since she passed, but believe you me ... I miss her every single day.


However, I think this March will be quite different from any before it. This month will mark the debut of a new online magazine called AdoptionVoicesMagazine.com. I have an interest in it because the creator of this new publication contacted me in December asking if I would like to be a contributor. WOULD I!!!! So I began to submit articles for her, including an article for her blog so she could introduce me to her readers.


Jane Ballback is an adoptive mother who has spent most of her children's lives educating herself on the ins and outs of adoption. She came up with the idea for the magazine after her retirement when she began to meet more and more people in the adoption world. Her attitude is infectious. Her knowledge is vast. Her commitment to hearing ALL sides of the triad is unmatched. Not to mention, she is one of the most genuine women I have ever had the pleasure to meet.

Her blog is called You're My Second Moma, Aren't You? and not only does she talk about her adoption journey, she also brings to light many voices from all points of view in adoption. I have been introduced to some great writers through her blog, and her last post was something I wrote for her so she could introduce me to her readers. Thank you Jane!


So with the launch of the new magazine only weeks away, I would like to share Jane's blog and view with you. The link below will take you to the latest post, which is what I wrote for her. I encourage you to visit her site and take in some great writing not only from Jane, but also many others who write about adoption.


Relinquishing Rights: Three Children, Two Adoptions and One Courageous Mother

The Best of Open Adoption Blogs 2011

I received word this morning that one of my posts from last year was chosen by a reader at Production, Not Reproduction to be on this list! Thank you CYNTHIA! (Who in my mind had THE BEST post of the year this year with this nugget I loved!) I know, it is a little egotistical to blow your own horn. But if my horn blows loud enough for others to hear it, why not be proud of that beautiful noise?????


So I thought I would provide you with a link to the place where it is all stored, the BEST blog posts about open adoption! Thank you Heather for working so hard on your amazing site! Thank you to all the writers who opened their hearts and minds to speak so honestly about their adoption journey. And thank you to all or YOU for continually reading in order to learn more about this sometimes tricky subject!


I feel blessed to be in the company that I am in on this list! Amazing voices that deserve to be heard ... take some time this week to visit these posts and collect your own thoughts and ideas. It never hurts to see it from other points of view!

Best Of Open Adoption Blogs 2011

Fellow Blogger Shines with a Post Worth Reading!

Cynthia Christensen ~ Wife, Mother, Birth Mother, Author,Homeschooler & Lover of Life

I love the kindred spirits that I find in other Birth Mothers. So many I have met here online and cherish their thoughts, feelings, writings and view of life without the children that they brought into the world. One such woman is Cynthia. She is also an author of a fabulous book that I reviewed and reccomended to all of you a few months back.

Well, amazing Cynthia wrote a post that is so worthy, so compassionate and so right on from our point of view that I just had to share it with all of you. She is kind, loves all women and just has a way to sooth my soul when I need it most. I am proud to call her my friend, and so very proud of how she wears her heart on her sleeve and shares her journey with all of us out here in Blog Land.

Please click and read her latest post. It is BRILLIANT! The 6th paragraph could be considered some of the wisest words I have ever read regarding adoption and birth families.

Kuddos to you Cynthia for sharing this, for sharing your thoughts and most of all .... for sharing that amazing heart of yours! If you like what she has to say, then please sign up to receive her future posts. I yet to read a post of her that has not made me sit and think for a while!

The Post Worthy of Reading ... RIGHT NOW! ~ Dear Adoptive Parents

My review of her book: Restorative Grief

Looking for it will bring it!

Been staying away from the drama of the adoption world for a while now. I have not come across too many heart stabbing comments, at least not as many as I used to. Perhaps that is because I have not gone out looking for them, therefore I have not been too annoyed with anons lately.

No shoe is going to drop here, there is not a "however" or "until I saw this" to this post. I realized that perhaps I was looking for those comments to have something to talk about. Sure, I come across them from time to time ... the comments that just shock me or make me cringe because of the cold and callus manner in which they are thrown across the computer screen. But as of lately, haven't seen them.

I know that I could find them, but I really do not want to. I like it when I am not shocked by what people think of birth mothers, or adoption for that matter. Life is different for everyone out there. Not one life has lived the same as another no matter how hard it is attempted. No two people are alike, at least not exactly, so no two people are going to agree 100% of the time. And as we all know, in adoption there can be one word that just sends people off into their own world far away from those that they thought they were close to.

I guess my point is that if you go looking for the aggravation, then you will find it. Then, once you find it ... it is as if your mind just wants to take a hold of it and run. Run into that disagreement, run into that desperate or angry manner in which you try so hard to make someone else see your side that you begin to doubt what it is that you believe. You don't have to go there. You don't have to argue your points to someone who might not understand your side of it. Sure, it might feel good to get it off your chest and if that is what you are truly trying to do then keep up the good work. Just don't loose yourself trying to talk with the wrong people. If you let it in, you have to decide what you will do with it. See their side of it, or create your own opinion. Either way, it will take some self searching to learn how to handle the feelings and emotions that maybe, just maybe you have been avoiding as to not come to terms with what you do not want to face.

Great Post About Mother's Day From Another Mother

So, an aquaintance of mine on Facebook left a comment on a question that I posted on my fan page about Mother's Day and Birth Mother's Day. We got into a conversation about the controversy about the two days and boy oh boy did I love what she had to say! I asked her to blog for me, but it must have gotten her thinking because she posted her own thougths on the matter and again ... I  loved what she had to say!

With her permission, I am reposting her mind here on my blog and I sure hope you read her thoughts. She is a passionate woman who does not advocate for adoption, nor does she advocate against it. Matter of fact, she does not advocate at all. She just speaks her mind and her truths as she knows them and I, for one, am glad she is out there! Thank you Etropic for sharing your brilliance with all of us! Soooo glad you read that question that got you thinking ....

My Adoption Ambivalence ~ It's That Time Of Year Again

Top Adoption Blogs According to Adoptive Families Magazine

The award above is taken from AF website and is a direct link to their photo.

 

Just found this list and thought I would share. Of course there are many adoption blogs out there that deserve recognition, far too many to count. But this is a collection of 20 blogs that got the Kudos from the readers over there. Let me note, there is only ONE blog listed that is written by a birth mother, and only ONE blog listed that is written by an adoptee. To me, it seems that there should be more from THESE voices because it is those people that will give you the real insight into the world of adoption. (Not saying that Adoptive Parents, or AP's, don't know adoption, but their view is soooo different from the others. After all, they are the ones who eventually get to love the child as their own.)

Anyway, it is a nice list and I hope that you find some new reading material among them. I am sure it was a daunting task to just choose 20, I know that I have at least 70 blogs that I read on a weekly basis. And just for the record, many of them are from the birth parent side.

Thank you for making this list Adoptive Families, and in the future I hope that you consider just a few more of the first voices and the living it voices of adoptees and birth parents.

Adoptive Families Picks: Best Adoption Blogs

Time is Running Out to VOTE!

Just a reminder that you don't have much time to vote!

Over at Grown In My Heart, they are taking votes right now for your favorite adoption blog! If you have a blog that you love to read, then please visit this link and tell the world who's voice you cannot live without. Hurry, nominations will only be accepted until tomorrow, February 15th!

Top Adoption Blogs ~ Vote Today!

Over at Grown In My Heart, they are taking votes right now for your favorite adoption blog! If you have a blog that you love to read, then please visit this link and tell the world who's voice you love. Hurry, nominations will only be accepted until February 15th!

Starting my OWN List, Wanna Help?

Just read a list of the top adoption blogs and guess what? Most of them were voices that are more than negative and not a ONE that had anything good to say about adoption. What kind of list is that? I am tired of reading about all the nastiness that people have to say about adoption and would love to see a list of people who have GOOD things to say!

Think I will start my own list of Top Bloggers, perhaps this is what I should start working on for a big fat list in 2011 of "Feel Good Blogs in Adoption". Any suggestions for me? Do you know of a blog that is outstanding in their expressions? Let me know, I would love to hear what you have to say!