Thursday, May 6, 2010

16 and Pregnant...Helping or Hindering?

So, a few weeks ago I read a wonderful article about the new season of '16 and Pregnant' and the trial and tribulations of a new cast member who was struggling with the decision to place her child for adoption. It was actually someone who had read the blog of the cast member and wrote his thoughts on the whole thing. It explained that this young woman had been thinking adoption all along and blogging her journey through thoughts and insights. It turns out that after giving birth, she had a change of heart and decided to keep her baby. After sometime at home with her child, she realized that she was not capable of raising her and then placed the baby with a family member. The description of her writing, her honesty with herself about her fears...the writer of the review was fantastic and I really enjoyed the article.

I was just about to leave when I saw the number of comments and my curiosity kicked in and I clicked on the window that would allow me to read others thoughts about this article. When my eyes read the very first comment, a wave of disgust and sickness filled my gut. It was so horrific that I actually did not breathe for a moment, followed by a gasp, then a silence filled with sadness in my heart. This comment was the reason why I thought the show might have more negative repercussions that positive ones. Our young society is a little askew about the realities of raising a child when they themselves are still children (though they would not agree at all!) There, from a reader, came this sentence. "My boyfriend and I are trying to get pregnant so we can be on this show!" Are you sick? You the reader, are you sick? Read what she said one more time and allow yourself to absorb that mentality.

Now that you have seen it, can you understand why I was appalled? There are actually girls out there who have this thinking, this desire to be looked at by millions of people and be judged for the rest of her life based on some crazy need to be what society wants her to be. No one can tell me that the media of today, be it television, movies, magazines, music cannot convince me that the media of today does not affect our youth. For this girl to say that just made me angry. That is the worst reason in the world to have a baby, so you can be on TV. Really? Has our society come to this? I mean, I have a real love/hate relationship with this show. I understand that MTV has a good idea to try and show the REALITY of being pregnant at a young age and making a lifelong decision that is documented to help others in the position. I know that this point of view, this show that is so very popular, can and will help some out there make an educated choice for their situation. What I have a problem with is how it glamorizes these girls. The show kinda shows the angst that comes out and I think that drives the young audience to think that getting pregnant is a good way to strike back at parents by saying..."Well, I have my own child now so you can't tell me what to do anymore!" Hey, I remember being young and thinking of way to lash out at my mom, but getting pregnant was not one of them!

Wanting to get pregnant for revenge or stardom is not a valid reason for bringing a child into this world. I would hope that anyone who is reading this knows that. And if by some chance you do find yourself pregnant at a young age, find resources that will help you make the right choice for YOU! Don't do it for anyone else but for you and your child. Think about the amount of time, patience, love, forgiveness, knowledge and resources it will take to care for another human being for the rest of your life...for the rest of their life. It is a 24 hour a day job that will bring out the best in you, the worst in you and the wonders of life as you have never seen it before. Life through another's eyes, life that is dependant that you will always be there. Life through another's eyes that will look to you to guide them the right way, a healthy way. Life through another's eyes that want you to teach them about life, about love. Think about all the reasons why, or why not, and then figure it out for yourself. Don't rely on a television show to draft your life, your smarter than that. Or are you?


Amanda said...

Ugh, I followed that girl for a while. But she was so full of drama and hate that I stopped. People were rude to her. But she was rude back. People who at one point were trying to help her were being talked poorly about and she was bad mouthing them. I read the article you are talking about but didn't see the comment part. I totally think this show needs tp stop. Yes its showing the trials of teen parents. But it's just making others want to do it.

LeMira said...

I think my heart sank all the way to my feet.

deannalynnc said...

That really makes me sad! I can't believe someone would say that. I would like to see more statistics however on how many people have her thinking compared to the hundreds of others who respect and support the decision Caytlynn (sp) made on the first season. I can't judge the entire show by one girls comment even though it was very hard to read. :-( I know some girls whose friends get pregnant and decide they want to get pregnant just like their friend.

Any any way, if the statistics show this show harming more then it is helping then is should get taken off the air. Being in my 20's now and out of H.S for awhile, I forget how H.S. kids view different situations.

Campbell said...

Recently my 20 year old son asked me if I'd seen this show. I'd said yes and we shared views on it and I'd said that I thought perhaps it would illustrate to young people that it's very difficult if you get pregnant at a young age and might help them make better choices.
My son was surprised. He didn't think it would do anything of the sort.