Thursday, June 30, 2011

Looking for it will bring it!

Been staying away from the drama of the adoption world for a while now. I have not come across too many heart stabbing comments, at least not as many as I used to. Perhaps that is because I have not gone out looking for them, therefore I have not been too annoyed with anons lately.

No shoe is going to drop here, there is not a "however" or "until I saw this" to this post. I realized that perhaps I was looking for those comments to have something to talk about. Sure, I come across them from time to time ... the comments that just shock me or make me cringe because of the cold and callus manner in which they are thrown across the computer screen. But as of lately, haven't seen them.

I know that I could find them, but I really do not want to. I like it when I am not shocked by what people think of birth mothers, or adoption for that matter. Life is different for everyone out there. Not one life has lived the same as another no matter how hard it is attempted. No two people are alike, at least not exactly, so no two people are going to agree 100% of the time. And as we all know, in adoption there can be one word that just sends people off into their own world far away from those that they thought they were close to.

I guess my point is that if you go looking for the aggravation, then you will find it. Then, once you find it ... it is as if your mind just wants to take a hold of it and run. Run into that disagreement, run into that desperate or angry manner in which you try so hard to make someone else see your side that you begin to doubt what it is that you believe. You don't have to go there. You don't have to argue your points to someone who might not understand your side of it. Sure, it might feel good to get it off your chest and if that is what you are truly trying to do then keep up the good work. Just don't loose yourself trying to talk with the wrong people. If you let it in, you have to decide what you will do with it. See their side of it, or create your own opinion. Either way, it will take some self searching to learn how to handle the feelings and emotions that maybe, just maybe you have been avoiding as to not come to terms with what you do not want to face.